9.17.2010

Just when I want to be a whiner...

ok. so today is not a great day... it's that lovely time of the month... yay... the first couple days are the hardest. I know, hormones, cramps, blech... But some of it has to do with "well, this is another month we didn't get pregnant." and I was feeling all bitchy and whiney... so before I posted my blog I wanted to check up on some of the blogs I follow, and I hit up Bethany's Elegant WordArt blog.

Bethany does some of the most beautiful word art I have ever seen. Also, her daily stories, wisdom and photos normally brighten my day. I'm a "stalker" I guess, because I really do enjoy reading about her and her family. I love how she describes herself on her blog:
"Hi all. My name is Bethany, and I'm a 34 yr old, happily married, stay-at-home mom, with 5 kids. Yes, they're all mine. And they have the same Dad. And we had them AFTER we got married."

Anyway, I really like her and her blog. Well, so I checked her latest update, and it was her husband writing, talking about Bethany being in a mental hospital... WHAT?! Yes, a mental hospital... so then I had to go back about 3 blogs to get the beginning. Let me give you the short version:

Bethany worked for a few years to lose 110 pounds, she's always writing about her meal plan, and her work outs. Well, she says at one point that she just quit eating. there were times she'd go a day or two without eating anything, but she'd drink diet pepsi like it was going out of style. Anyway, a little less than a week ago, she was very down, sleepy, tired, and just wanted to take a sleeping pill and go to bed. She was very depressed and made an offhanded comment to a friend about how she just wanted to hurt herself. The friend rushed over, got her out of the house. Hubby went to lunch with her, and realized things were bad. He took her to the ER at the local mental hospital, and they wound up admitting her. They think that the depression was brought on by her not eating (vitamin deficiency maybe).

She's been there for most of the week, and she seems like she's doing better. They put her on an antidepressant and she's eating better, still foods on her meal plan, but multiple meals a days. Her faith in God is getting stronger too. I think they are Mormon, and her faith was strong before, but she's strengthening it every day. She misses her kids, husband, and friends.

So yeah, I'm whining about having a bad day... I know I'm not depressed, just an off day. It's kind of hard to be depressed with a husband like mine, he's just so much fun... and my friends are wonderful and I have the most precious beautiful nieces and nephews a girl could ask for... I know I have a good life. I know I have faith that in the end, things will work out the way I want them to... it just takes time...

I shouldn't pray for patience, because patience only comes when it's tested, and I don't want it to get tested. So now, I pray for wisdom for my doctor, strength for my husband, and readiness for when it does happen to us...

I feel like I'm about to cry... time to quit blogging...

Sorry for the long post... just the hormones from Aunt Flow, huh?

<3 Jess

(Sorry for the TMI)

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